December is the month when it kicks in hard. As our minds wander into the next year, it is also the time when we reflect, introspect, reminisce, and also try to forget somethings of the past year. And then hope to make the next one much better!
This intense desire for Self-Improvement peaks during the New Year time. And then much like a paper flight that takes off and then cannot sustain the headwinds, the desire wavers and plunges.
22% of resolutions fail after the first week. 40% of resolutions fail after a month. 50% in the first three months and 60% fail in the first half of the year.
Only 8% of plans manage to stay the course!
One reason why most people find it difficult to sustain their self-improvement plans is because it is about changing behaviour, perceptions, reactions and habits. These are hard to sustain.
It’s about choosing to change certain key behaviours in a way that changes your life for the better.
Choosing to change tests the depth of our desire for change and that can only be sustained by behaviours we adopt and building a support system that will not let us fall off the grid.
Here are FIVE specific actions that can get us started towards self-improvement journey in 2023 and keep us going.
Clarity
Wanting get better at everything is often the first big stumbling block. When one aims to get better at everything, then be rest assured that there is nothing getting better. Clarity is building the ability to choose what really matters now and also dropping what is not of immediate relevance.
It’s a lack of clarity that creates chaos and frustration. Those emotions are poison to any living goal.”
Steve Maraboli in ‘Life, the Truth, and Being Free’
Conversations
Conversations help build clarity. With a coach or a confidant who is willing to listen and has the ability to step back and nudge you to explore the choices you must make. Conversations that are free flowing, unbiased and built in an environment of trust and genuine introspection are transformative and priceless in the self-improvement journey.
“Our work, our relationships, and our lives succeed or fail one conversation at a time. While no single conversation is guaranteed to transform a company, a relationship, or a life, any single conversation can..”
Susan Scott, Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time
Community
Conversations flourish when there is trust, intimacy, freedom and an element of informality that only a closely knit Community can offer. Communities thrive because of a set of individuals who are connected with a common purpose, have a sense of belonging and support each other. Communities are that third vital space after your home and office where one can freely bring conversations that matter.
The deep connections that one makes in a community cheer you along your self-improvement journey and lift you up when the going gets tough. This is your vital support system.
Concreteness
The biggest enemy for self-improvement is staying abstract. Statements like ‘I will become the best version of myself in 2023’ are at best a 50,000 feet vision statement. Concreteness is about defining goals clearly, making them specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound (SMART).
Continuous
The journey towards self-improvement is continuous and the smallest improvements done over time have a staggering compounding effect. Just 1% improvement every week of the year over the previous week gets you to become 67% better!
Like James Clear says in his book ‘Atomic Habits’, we often overestimate the impact of the short term and do not comprehend the long term compounding impact of habits.
Mentza’s Self Improvement Learning Group embodies these very principles of Clarity, building engaging Conversations within inclusive Communities that will help make your efforts Concrete and Continuous!
Uday Kiran
Partner with Mentza, Business Storyteller, Leadership Coach & Trainer helping Organisations, Brands, Leaders to Scale, Secure a Dominant position and become their best version in the marketplace.
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